Pick me, OJ

DeJuan C3PO
Fly Scribe

Name: Charles Xavier "DeJuan" Curtis C3Po
Hometown: The City of Angels, CA

Objective:
Get my hands on a fine position within OJ Mayo's inner circle now that the high-flying wunderdawg has decided to select some new friends. Willing to run errands and such, and unafraid to be called part of a "posse."

Summary of Achievements
Flotsam Media
2006-present: Fly scribe. Undercover brother journalism investigation of 2006 Olympics, the Barry Bonds shit, the Winter baseball meetings, and some hockey. Developed ability to irritate other media types. Generated large palette of adjectives and nouns, so if you need someone to tell that camera guy where he can stick it and you want it to be colorful, I'm your man.

West Coast Wonderland Tour
2004-2006: Supporting act (technical title: "roadie"). Hung out with several hip hop legends on tour across America. Would have held a more hands-on role, were it not for freak pyrotechnics accidents caused by a slight, tiny oversight on my part.

Mooch
2002-2004: Saw the countryside. Mostly lived in assorted basements. Blogged.

Experience
2007-present
Watched a bunch of your games on TV. Developed strong dislike for OJ Mayo haters. Coined term "No Holding the Mayo" in the national blogosphere. Bitches, I'm like a big deal on the web.

2007
Started paying attention to college basketball. Cool shit.

2000-2002
Propensity for being fly developed, worked with large crowds. Brokered endorsement deals here and there. I've already made some calls to Miracle Whip, and they are totally interested in working something out.

1993-1997
Junior varsity basketball, Lake Elsinore High School, San Diego, CA

Education

2000-2004
School of Hard Knocks
Specialization: Sexy

1993-1997
Lake Elsinore High School
San Diego, CA

Selected Publications

"DeJuan Does History or Something," published by Flotsam Media. On-Line. May 10, 2006. http://www.flotsam-media.com/2006/05/dejuan-does-history-or-something.html.

"People I've Impersonated", published by Flotsam Media. On-Line. March 12, 2008. http://www.flotsam-media.com/2008/03/people-ive-impersonated.html.