Are you kinda funny? Can you spell? Do you think today's sportswriting landscape needs at least one more hackneyed, recycled opinion?

Marv Blackstone
Editor-in-chief

Attention, loyal Flotsam readers. The hard-working staff here at the Internet's leader of unfounded, biased sports opinions is looking for some additional talent.

Have you ever dreamed of writing unpaid blog posts for a website composed entirely of either un-informed or over-informed writers who allow their personal biases to color every word they write? Has anyone besides your Mom ever told you that you're funny?

If so, apply to be a Flotsam staff member today!

We're looking for a writer who can contribute 1-2 posts per week, and can lend some new ideas to our burgeoning media empire. Got a great character idea? Thoughts on possible new features? We'd like to hear them.

Benefits include:

- No pay
- Weekly au natural webcam chats with me, Marv
- Having your pseudonymn published for a growing Internet audience
- A faint sense of journalistic-moral-superiority

Interested? If so, send a writing sample or two, and an idea of what sort of "writer" you'd like to be, to flotsammedia-AT-gmail-DOT-com.

If you're awesome, we'll be in touch. If not awesome, we may accidentally lose your e-mail.

Apply today!